why all the pain?How often are we honest with ourselves?

Our self-esteem and our self-image is often challenged when we discover that we have sides to ourselves that we do not really want to acknowledge or when our surroundings condemn things which we are drawn to as immoral reprehensible. It is In moments like these we need the support of others’ more than ever as we are exposed instead of feeling excluded. It is in moments like these we need encouraging words which tell us that everything will be all right, instead of feeling the effects of a social stigma.

How often are those who condemn us honest with themselves?

Those who condemn us, often based on moral grounds, do not realize that they effectively prevent us from being who we wish to be; ourselves. Their own moral boundaries are for some reason more important than the right that others have to be themselves and old moral or religious arguments are often used as a simple excuse to restrict the right that other people have to make their own choices.

Who is affected by the lack of honesty?

Anyone who is gay, transgender, bisexual, BDSM practitioner and all those who are considered to have a sexual behavior that is outside the “norm” are affected. It is nothing else but a great loss to all those involved that people are exposed to a social stigma just because they exercise the right they have to their own sexuality.

I have 3 kids and I raise them to become independent individuals who can stand tall based on their own choices. I teach my children what kind of rights they have and that they have a right to their own sexuality no matter what the surrounding people around them might feel. I believe that many parents share the same goal, but despite this I hear often about friends and family who reject their own flesh and blood because of what they believes is a deviant sexuality.

How can you, as a friend or parent, reject someone you love and who you care about? How can you, as a parent, reject someone who you have brought up to be a strong and independent individual, how can you alienate someone who had made the choice to be their own?

The questions are many, but can you honestly answer any of them?

People shouldn’t have to experience pain and anxiety because of their sexuality, people shouldn’t have to experience social stigma as a result of their own choice to be the one who they really are.

Do you believe it should be like this?



DeSade Magazine covers BDSM from the inside. It is an online magazine created and crafted by experienced BDSM practitioners for anyone who is interested in personal stories, techniques, how-to’s and everything surrounding BDSM around the world.


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