There are periods in your life when you need to be silent, there are periods in your life when everything stacks up and there are periods in your life when problems, that should have been solved a long time ago, need to be solved.

I had to take my silent timeout and I had to solve a lot of things that were long overdue and this is why it has been fairly quiet here.

Sometimes it turns out that a relationship you once had faith in and believed being a strong one wasn’t as strong as you thought and suddenly everything explodes with a big bang and you wonder what the hell happened.

Some of you might think that a situation like that leaves you with emotional scars and a bitter taste in your mouth.

Well, if I were a person that would become emotionally scarred and have a bitter taste in my mouth then I wouldn’t have learnt anything about myself because I believe that you are in a state of blaming your former significant other if you turn into a bitter person. I also believe that blame stops you in a very efficient way from learning what your own contribution was that created the mess from the start.

The blame game stops you from realizing that change is the only constant force in the universe and even love and relationships tend to change over time. It’s something that we forget when we embrace the security of feeling loved in a relationship and when love itself puts a fuzzy blanket around our intuition, our gut feelings, and it creates emotional blind spots where our sense of security resides. In the end it makes us believe that a relationship is almost a static entity, which it never is.

When we realize that our perception of a relationship is wrong, then the strength of the relationship is being put to the test.

The relationship I had six months ago didn’t stand the test and that’s why I had to go silent.

Fire changes life as we know it, but it also creates ashes and ashes makes a foundation for a new aspiring life and revelations about ourselves.

The ashes hold small shards of your experiences from past relationships and it’s from these experiences you build your knowledge about yourself – The ashes are full of nutrition which you build new and better relationships upon.

This is where I am now and the silence is over…


DeSade Magazine covers BDSM from the inside. It is an online magazine created and crafted by experienced BDSM practitioners for anyone who is interested in personal stories, techniques, how-to’s and everything surrounding BDSM around the world.


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