Now and then, mostly initiated by religious fanatics, the discussion around sexuality, genes and the correlation between them pops up. I am sure that many of you that read this have probably heard questions from people that believes that there is a single event that has turned you into your kinkster.
The gay community has been subject to the same type of argumentation and the illusive gay gene has been in the spotlight a lot of times.
To me the matter is way more complex than a gene or a single event – There might not be a reason, it is just the way we are. I am a kinkster because I am…It is a simple as that.
The most prominent reason to why I don’t like sexuality being connected to specific events or genes is that it implies that “it can be fixed” – If we only know the reasons to why people are gay, Dominants, Submissives or sadists then we can “fix” them.
Thank you very much, but I don’t want to get fixed as I am perfectly fine with who I am and what I like to do in regards to my sexuality
Maybe it is time that we try to identify the genes that turn some people into religious fanatics?
I think this is a part of a larger problem – it's undeniably good to know if, for instance, our genes are carrying a predisposition of an illness that might be curable if caught early enough. It would be great if we could grow spare livers in vats. It's wonderful that a pregnant mother can find out if her fetus is healthy – but knowing what sex it is… well, we know what that has led to in cultures where male babies are preferable to females.
The problem is our society is not emotionally or ethically mature enough to handle that kind of science very well. I'm torn. In some ways it might be good to know that being gay or submissive was genetic, because it would allow us to shrug our shoulders and say – hey, this was the way I was born, so fuck off. On the other hand, as you say, who on earth wants to be 'fixed' when what is perceived as a flaw by some is an integral part of their identity to others.
Ultimately, whether kink or sexual orientation or gender perception is genetic or not, I still think it is healthier to believe that it is a choice. To act as if it were a choice. That way, we have agency.